In June I posted, Five Serious Summer Goals. The point was that if I had these five things to focus on, especially with the precariousness of my health, it was possible that I could do my part to improve my situation (and to be honest, the goals were prioritized). I’ve been evaluating those goals and I give myself a 2.45/5 and yet if the goals are weighted, I give myself a 4.75. I have never been so happy to not be perfect because no, I didn’t do a good job spending time with God everyday and no, I did not purge a third of my possessions. But I did the most important thing (and what I believe was the most God honoring thing at the time) and that was 1. I treated food as medicine in an intense and complete way that is putting my health back on track to my body’s version of its best and 2. I prioritized my health for the very same reasons.
The fact is, if I would not have prioritized those two things, I wouldn’t be able to focus on anything now. Physically, I was in such a place that so much was not possible. I have come so far and am very proud of myself (proud of myself in the way that the I had a huge wake up call that knocked me on metaphorical butt and things were so dire because I didn’t care for my illness for so long if you know what I am saying).
Things are still serious. Yes, I have come a long way but I can’t backslide. I have to keep trucking along. I believe that things are just as serious now as they were in June, even if the goals have shifted a bit.
So without further ado, my 5 Serious Autumn Goals
+continue to treat food as medicine
Like I said, in that post, this is about lifestyle changes. I am super radical right now because it is necessary in order to get my pain levels down but even after that, I truly do not want to ever get back to the place where I “forget” what the consequences can be and start eating Ben and Jerry’s when I need a pick me up. Some people can do that and still be healthy. I just cannot. I have tried to be that person so many times and every time I end up in same position so I expect, with the way things have been going, I will reevaluate exactly how radical I am in the wintertime but for now, it’s still serious.
+pray big things
I have realized I do not do this. I mean, my prayer life could always use some work, let’s be honest. But the fact is, I don’t ask for a lot of things and I think the reason is that I don’t believe they will actually happen. It’s mostly lack of faith in me…as in I don’t want to imagine certain things in case they don’t happen. But really when you dig deep, it’s a lack of faith in Him because he can do anything. And I am not “protecting” myself (which I believe is my mindset) by not dreaming and praying big. So this Autumn, God and I? We are dreaming and asking big.
+invest in where I live
This means a few things. I may need to move do to my rent increasing which seems really impossible with health still iffy and just the fact that I am so bad at moving. It seems so overwhelming. But it needs to be reevaluated and dealt with, Nina. It does. It also means finding a church and getting involved. It also means making new friends and being open. So it means a lot of things. Again, things have to be prioritized. I can’t do these things if I don’t continue to prioritize my health and also pray for the strength and help to do these things.
+purging one third of my possessions
So this just needs to happen. Period. End of story. And it is much more likely since my weight is settling and I can actually evaluate my clothing and what I have. But I mean, clothing is only part of the problem. The books are out of control.
+grow my business and be ambitious about writing
Again, there was an attitude (when it came to my writing) that I wanted so badly to be published or be writing but what if it didn’t happen? So I haven’t put myself out there. And I need to (kind of like dating. Am I right? Word).
So there it is. That’s where I am at and where I am going. When people ask me how I am I say, I am doing great but I have a long way to go and that’s basically the situation.
Also P.S. are you subscribed to my monthly newsletter? Basically you get an extra story (some writing) in your inbox and Nonna’s column where she answers questions you ask anonymously about anything. Seriously, she is crazy and amazing and this month she has got some great questions to answers. Sign up here. I keep it short, sweet, lovely, and funny (or try to).
I’m linking up with Darci, Christina, Natasha, April, Karli, Amy.
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