Welcome to the Wednesday Showcase #74! The holidays are upon us, and we are loving all your posts! Come share your ideas this week and check out what the other linkers shared.
For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be a writer. Right now I am doing marketing and ghostwriting for clients and I enjoy it. But at the end of the day, when I finish writing the story for my client, someone else’s name goes on that book. And it is okay because I am learning so much. But I am so thrilled to tell you that I have my first byline with my name on it…which brings me to my first article published at HelloGiggles.
I had an idea about a month ago for an article that talked about how dating during an election–specifically this election–was a pain. My friend and fellow writer, MK, insisted that I “pitch” the idea to publications. But I put it off. It was a combination of being afraid of rejection and just not wanting to write anything about this election. But then MK forced my hand. Thank goodness she did because HelloGiggles picked it up.
Listen, I would love it if you read it. If you are on election coverage overboard, don’t worry. That’s not the thrust of the piece. Because in the time I took putting it off, my feelings of dating during an election actually changed. This is not a piece about the election or anyone’s politics. It’s how I learned a great deal about dating and myself through the recent political happenings. It’s meant to be lighthearted.
Here’s the piece:
But will you do me a favor and read it: Why dating during an election will teach you a lot about yourself — and the person you’re seeing?
If you do click and read, thanks so much for your support. Feel free to give me any feedback. I can take it. You just reading it would mean the world…and if you feel like sharing it, that would be amazing.
I’ve seen all things pumpkin blogged about so I thought I would do one master post because yes, I am basic but I also can’t drag this pumpkin thing on forever. You know? So I am doing all things pumpkin in one post and calling it a freaking day.
Let’s start with my mom’s infamous pumpkin sheet cake.
Nearly everything I make around this time of year (and 99.9% of things I make that involve pumpkin) come from this original recipe. I will never forget the first Thanksgiving my whole family met up for dessert at my dad’s house. The table include my mom, my dad, my stepmom, my little sister, and myself (my brother was watching football, obviously). It could have been awkward but everyone was too busy making delicious sounds every time they took a bite. In my mind, this sheet cake (and therefore, all the recipes that evolved from it) broke the ice.
I originally told this story and shared the for the pumpkin sheet cake here. It’s my words and my ma’s recipe, I promise. I just want the place I originally published it to get the credit.
Then there are the cookies. Oh my goodness, yum. Yum. Just…yum.
Again, you can find the original recipe for the pumpkin cookies at My Cooking Spot here where I originally shared it. And did I mention all of this is so supremely easy it is almost sickening?
You can’t forget the frosting. I shared it with you all last year.
This frosting is the easiest and most delicious cream cheese frosting ever. You could easily use it for a Red Velvet Cake or really anything. I sure do.
I veered away from Mom’s recipe to try my hand at Pumpkin Macarons with Pumpkin Spice Filling. Okay, here is the thing. I had the wrong pan so they didn’t look the prettiest.
But the filling. Oh, gosh. I could have eaten the filling with a spoon. Maybe next time? Here is the recipe.
Speaking of spoons, for those of us who are trying to treat food as medicine…none of this is medicine. This is the sound I am making: womp, womp, womp. However, I did create a Pumpkin Spice Greek Yogurt recipe (can you even call it a recipe when it is so easy?).
Again, you can find this original recipe at My Cooking Spot. I’ve seen a lot of bloggers make their own pumpkin spice so maybe that is something to try this year.
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For the record, I have said I would never ghost someone. For the record, I also said I would never do online dating. I am online dating. And I have ghosted. I had reasons. So here we are: the truth about ghosting.
(Please know I am writing this because I was asked too. I want to respect everyone, really. Also, the graphic is not a real conversation…I made it up on a website LOL but is perhaps inspired by real events).
For those of you who did not know what ghosting is, the urban dictionary defines it as: “The act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone the subject is dating, but no longer wishes to date. This is done in hopes that the ghostee will just “get the hint” and leave the subject alone, as opposed to the subject simply telling them he/she is no longer interested. Ghosting is not specific to a certain gender and is closely related to the subject’s maturity and communication skills. Many attempt to justify ghosting as a way to cease dating the ghostee without hurting their feelings, but it in fact proves the subject is thinking more of themselves, as ghosting often creates more confusion for the ghostee than if the subject kindly stated how he/she feels.”
Now, based on that definition, I guess I have not ghosted.
Let me explain. I never thought I would ghost someone because I really do seek to treat people the way I want to be treated. It would hurt my feelings, no matter how invested I was or wasn’t, if someone just ceased talking to me. So I made a policy to never ghost.
But did I mention that I made that policy at a time when I wasn’t really dating, let alone internet dating?
What I have come to understand about internet dating (and, in some cases, dating in general) is that sometimes I have to go with my gut. I am all about meeting sooner rather than later (safely though) (and I should probably do a post on that concept too!) but depending on if they are close or far away, you may not meet them before your gut is telling you: uh oh. I’ve gone on plenty of dates from online dating and even briefly dated someone from it. But in the two cases where I ghosted on purpose, my gut was going off like a car alarm.
Ghosting Case Number One:
Let’s call him Sam. Sam seemed super nice and intentional…at first. We had a skype date after communicating for awhile. He was a couple of minutes late because he wanted to iron his shirt (he confessed with embarrassment to me). This endeared Sam to me. I share these details to show you that Sam was and I am sure, is not, a monster. He appeared sweet and kind. After the skype date, we started to text. This is when things went to a place I was not comfortable.
He started talking to me a lot, including many selfies and pictures of every part of his day…and I do mean every part of his day. This would still not be reason enough to ghost for me, especially with my relatively little experience with internet dating at this point. He started asking me for photos, specific photos. Nothing totally dirty. Sam is a Christian. But when I said no, I will not send you a picture of me in my pjs (!!!), he did not respect my boundaries.
He also started using terms of endearment as soon as we finished with the skype date. Again, this would not be reason enough for me to ghost someone. But when I was really upfront about the fact that it made me uncomfortable because we had only skyped once, he argued with me. [Read more…]